2013-03-26T154439Z_01_JME103_RTRMDNP_3_USA-GAYMARRIAGEA colleague said to me yesterday that I was being awfully quiet concerning gay marriage that is being debated before the Supreme Court.

I said to her that I wanted to be careful how I respond, because homosexuals feel very passionate about this issue. Despite what many might believe, we are not here to condemn homosexuals but to reach out to them. The homosexuals of today are our hope of tomorrow. I have written articles on such things in the past with a tone that I now regret. The Lord is changing my heart to be more mature and more loving.

As I watched the news this morning, listening to the arguments of the court in hearing the attorneys’ points, I thought maybe I should share something. Everyone is jumping on the gay marriage band wagon. Its like the boat no one wants to miss. Hillary Clinton, who was widely known as being pro-homosexual came out in favor of gay marriage a few days ago, which was no surprise to anyone. I see this as a political move more than anything, since she disapproved of gay marriage when her husband ran for president. Many on both sides of the aisle, republican and democrat, are doing the same thing.

Gay marriage has become the en vogue thing to support. My assistant pointed out to me yesterday how so many of her Facebook friends had changed their profile picture to the equal rights symbol. Homosexuality has become widely accepted in today’s culture. Those fighting for homosexual rights equate it to the equal rights of the sixties for blacks, and many black leaders like Dr. Martin Luther King’s wife have joined their cause in agreement.

It seems that everyone is choosing sides quickly to be seen on the right side of history. I won’t list all the various names, but one of recent is evangelist Rob Bell.

*”Speaking recently at Grace Cathedral in San Francisco, he officially came out in support of marriage equality. “I think the ship has sailed and I think the church needs—I think this is the world we are living in and we need to affirm people wherever they are,” Bell continued.”

Honestly, I think he’s right on one point that seems to be a point of reality, that “the ship has sailed.” This seems to be a battle that the church has lost. I would draw a sharp distinction though in his word “affirm.” I think we are going to have to accept the reality of the culture that we find ourselves in, however “affirm” is not a word the church should be using. Affirm means to call something good and to show approval of. I do believe though, that we need to accept how people choose to show and receive love, as hard as that my sound.

Our reality is that the clock is not going to be reversed, all the liberal gains in our culture are not going to be undone. Homosexuality is widely accepted and if not now, very soon we will have gay marriage, most likely nationwide. Will the Supreme Court ignore this growing tide of acceptance? Only time will tell, but it is unlikely.

I made my choice a long time ago, and I’m thankful for it. I believe God’s plan for one man and one woman in marriage and in family is best, but not everyone agrees with this for their lives.

We are never going to win anyone over to the side of God’s love and His great plan for their life by yelling condemnation and certainly not by holding signs and using bullhorns. We must be careful with the words and tone we use. However, we must not feel this need to join sides to be on the right side of history. Calling something that is wrong right, so it can be used to your political advantage is certainly not what we are called to do as believers in Christ. Doing what is right is often seen as wrong, but what is more important than that is doing it in a spirit of love.

Someone asked me this morning on Facebook, “How did you escape the gay lifestyle?” My answer was, “Really a God thing. Had a couple love on me. The Lord was working on my heart. I got saved at a Christian event. It wasn’t easy. Long maturing process but I count most everything to God and Him directing me.” It certainly was not a sermon or lecture of how wrong or evil my lifestyle was.

If there had been gay marriage back then, I’d probably have pursued it. I had a partner that I would have wanted to marry, however he was put in prison for vehicular manslaughter, taking him out of my life. Having marriage available wouldn’t have changed that I was going from relationship to relationship, trying to fill a God sized void in my life.

I’d really rather see marriage preserved for one man and one woman, however it seems that the growing tide is not on conservatism’s side. It seems that it rarely ever is on anything nowadays.

The question is now not whether we will have gay marriage or not, but what is going to be our response. If we show disdain for people, will they want what we have? What do we have if we are showing hate? It’s not Christianity. The Lord never showed contempt for the sinner. He loved them. I was loved by people into the Kingdom, that’s how I am here today.

Regardless of how this turns out, we must love one another if we are going to win anyone over to Christ. If your heart is filled with anger towards gays having marriage, then ask The Lord to change your heart. Ask to have His perspective, His heart. He loves everyone, including gays desiring marriage, and His will is that no one perish. How will they know Him, unless we show them, unless we love them, unless we pray for them. Let’s be the hands and feet of Jesus.

Let’s not affirm gay marriage or homosexuality, but let’s learn to accept people where they are, to pray for them, and to love them. Let’s leave the rest up to The Lord, and just maybe the homosexual couple you know will profess Christ as Lord and who knows what will happen.

I am living proof that God changes lives, and there are many men and women, young and old that are a part of our ministry as such examples.

* Source: Religious Dispatches, March 18, Evangelical Star Rob Bell Comes Out For Marriage Equality Post by NICOLE GREENFIELD

17 thoughts on “Can We Accept Gay Marriage?

  1. Thank you, McKrae – This is a wonderful article. It makes me think of something said in this past Sunday’s sermon – “What quality makes Jesus Christ the greatest leader of all time? LOVE.” I couldn’t agree more with your statement, “The Lord never showed contempt for the sinner. He loved them.” If we want to lead people to Christ, love is key–not affirmation, as you point out, but Christ’s love. Happy Easter!

  2. Dear Ones,
    Homosexuality has existed throughout the centuries including in Jesus’ time. It is clearly addressed in the Bible.
    Since “”the ship has sailed” are we just to sigh and say “Oh, well!” We are not loving if we close our eyes to people who are dining on pretty poison. We are to speak the truth in love and the directives of the Bible are not suggestions. God does clean His fish after He catches them but those who cling to a lifestyle repudiated by God are moving away from God not closer. It is a stronghold and a stronghold is called a stronghold because it has a strong hold on you. As a religious but not godly person, then as a person who wanted fire insurance but no Lord, I lived an immoral life. Then I made a commitment to Jesus and all that changed. Since 1979 I have been moving with Jesus and not swimming against His tide. Can a person with a same-sex attraction come to Christ? No doubt. Can a person come to Christ and pursue the things of the old life that are clearly identified as sin. Long term doubtful. We are called to purity. We must live purely, love purely, speak purely, and glorify God in all we are. In the same way as gossip, greed, pride, malice, and all types of sexual immorality are sin, same sex attraction is not an option for one pursuing Christ. As with all other sin, we must run, not walk, away from it.
    In His Love Always,

    1. Thank you for your comment in insight. Certainly I would agree, however your comment, “same sex attraction is not an option for one pursuing Christ. As with all other sin.” I would disagree with this comment. Attraction is not something someone can help or shape. It is something someone can understand and submit to God. Also attraction is a confusing word. Not everyone who has attractions lusts. Heterosexuals surely find people of the same sex attractive, but they do not lust after them. People like myself might find men attracted, and those of us with a SSA backgroud will probably continue to struggle with the boundaries of this because of it being our past and issue, but this does not mean it is lust. We do not choose our temptations or the timing of them.

      The point was not to say we should not be speaking out against such things as homosexuality or gay marriage, but to simply ask what are we going to do in this new world we are in. If we do not modify our methods when they stop or don’t work, then we need to modify them. Seems like Jesus had them down right from the beginning but we screwed them up. We have become the Pharisees of the past. Our flesh, maybe not in lust but in pride says like Jesus spoke about the Pharisee, “thank you Lord that I am not like the tax collector.” Luke 18:11

  3. The problem I see in some thoughts on our role regarding the gay marriage/homosexuality issue is this: Not one person…not one HETEROSEXUAL human being, nor one HOMOSEXUAL human being…has a promise of tomorrow! What if we have a “long-term” plan to “gradually” “win over” those who are lost…and those who are homosexual? WHAT IF, McKrae, your life had been lost BEFORE you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior? What happens to those we are AFRAID of “pushing away”…therefore, instead of CONFRONTING their sin we choose some “gradual” method of “ministering” to them (whatever that may be)…if we LOVE them only for them to die TOMORROW?

    More and more the Lord keeps saying to me: “Today is the day of salvation. For some, there will be no tomorrow. And you, Ron, do NOT KNOW who the person may be that crosses your path who does not have a future in TOMORROW. If you do not try to reach them TOTALLY today…then you will not have a chance to reach them AT ALL.

    1. Thank you Ron. I do not disagree with your urgency. However, as the old saying goes, “You can lead someone to water but you can’t make them drink.” The question really is, is the water we’re selling seem to be refreshing? The reason I came to Christ was because I wanted what Roy and Deneen Griffin (couple that loved me to the Lord) had. When I found out what it was that they had that I didn’t (Jesus), I wanted it; and it changed my life! I love your urgency. Urgency is great, as long as the method we use in our urgency is compelling. I’ve seen signs that say, “We’ll scare the Hell out of your kids!” Okay, that might work or that might not. Young people and older and more educated people need more than scare tactics. If they do not believe that we care about them as a person, then they won’t care what we are telling them. If Jesus hasn’t changed our heart and life to make us more loving, then why in the world would they want our Jesus or our lifestyle? We must ask ourselves if we are being like Jesus and not be like the Pharisees.

      1. I have friends and family who are pursuing the homosexual lifestyle. I read their posts and read the things they shared. I tried to listen, understand, and be constantly gentle and loving in my responses. One day, not in response to anything they had posted, I posted that I believed in sanctity of life, sanctity of marriage, and glorifying God in my life. That was not aimed at anyone. The attacks from these “loved ones” were virulent and malicious. They unfriended me on Facebook and the phone calls–pure nastiness. If they believed for one moment in same sex marriage then sanctity of marriage would not be a problem to them. They know that same sex marriage cannot be sanctified. Your original question: Can we accept gay marriage? We can love our homosexual friends and family but God designed marriage and defined it one man, one woman, for life. I divorced and remarried before I came to understand that. I was wrong. God is the only One who has the right to define marriage. There is never a right to do wrong. There is no civil right to for a man to marry a man or a woman to marry a woman. I am committed to be loving to others but I know for sure they are in no way committed to be loving toward Christians.
        And were you saying I was a Pharisee to your publican? Believe me, I have no illusions about myself, I know that absent God I am genuinely messed up. I am more than grateful for what He has done for me, and He has done it, not me.

  4. I understand your frustration. Your response, or blog, was twice as long as my blog. My blog is not to serve as a platform for others, but to give feedback and encouragement. The part I chose to share, I believe, encapsulated your intentions of writing in the first place. Certainly, the rest was used to get your point across, which I believe you had already done so.

  5. I understand. I apologize. I will be happy to delete all your posts. It is not my desire to give my blog over to anyone who has an ax to grind. I’m all for giving scripture verses. If you would have shared in a sysinct way, then I would have allowed it all to stand. However, you want me to allow anyone to share at egnausium. That’s why you have a blog and why I have a blog, but not to give others’ a platform to our followers and visitors. Sorry. I did not diagree with your points, but the way in which you have gone about this is just plain rude.

  6. In all of this dialogue, you could have resubmitted a more sysinct version, with scripture. Again, I have no problem with scripture. It was not my intention to remove your scriptures but to get what I felt was the crux of your argument. Resubmit something more sysinct, I’ll publish it and remove all these about editing.

    1. I so agree with marysheartisathome. You have captured my thoughts on this. So mqnypeople try to define complacency and compromise as “love”. Yes, God is fully love but he is fully just as well. He loved the adulterous woman but told her to go and sin no more. No we cannot be the holy spirit, but we can trust the Holy Spirit to work for us and give us the loving and straight forward answers that he wants us to impart when the time comes. Its called.preveniant grace. Where we pray andf submit to God’s will and he gies We need to love yet not coward down.

      1. Sorry….that last phrase got messed up. It should sat…” where we pray and submit to Gods will and he gives us the wisdom to speak or remain quiet. If he wants us to speak he will give is The words and make the ground soft. We need to love yet at the same time not coward down out of fear.”

  7. If we say, that is alright, God will destroy America.it is a tool of the Devil ,demon are following people, we have Pastor right now that is spreading the words of God, telling people how to be sat free,in this day and time, People should take a stand against the Devil, God will save the church, by catching us away,the Rapture is fixing to take place, and I won,t everybody to go, but if U are living that life style ,,U will not go, then all Hell will break lose on this earth,

  8. Perhaps the most reasonable way to go about addressing this issue is not through quoting lines from the scriptures, or invoke God’s love, or anything of that sort, but to give logic and common sense precedence over religion.
    Once we leave religion out of the picture, that makes things much simpler (we can stop arguing over contradictory lines from scriptures and guessing at some supposedly omnipotent being’s judgments of human affairs). Assuming that a personal God of the sort you imagine actually exists (which is no small assumption), the chances of you correctly guessing his thoughts are about as likely as a newborn baby guessing its parent’s thoughts. As a result, using God (or his soon-to-be punishments) as support for an argument is essentially meaningless, for a being of such complexity would be unfathomable to lower intelligent life forms such as us.

  9. I agree also with marysheartisahome, as well. My son has estranged himself from his Christian home where he was raised because at the age of 20 he has chosen the homosexual lifestyle while away at college. We have made many attempts to LOVE him without using religion, scriptures, or scare tactics. He said he does not want our love unless we affirm his choice. How can I do that? Betray God? My son has not seen his family in almost one year because we will not affirm his lifestyle as being good. The hate and rebellion that pours from his mouth and actions is not LOVE. We have had to completely let him go and submit him to God to convict him. I will not back down on my beliefs for this new culture.

  10. I am moving towards not caring what the government does. Government doesn’t decide for a Christian what is moral and immoral. Marriage should have never been given to the government to decide upon. My problem is when churches decide gay marriage is OK – as you said when the affirm it and perform it.

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